Moose FM CFZN 93.5 - Haliburton

Sorry. It’s a word whose meaning and use changes over the course of ones lifetime. As a small child it’s said almost gleefully, I can remember my daughter as a toddler using it as a free pass when she would spill her sippy cup, “ I sorry Daddy” and we would all gush about how darn sweet she was. Then when her brother came along and she would pound on him for touching her dolly, her Mother would suggest she apologize to the poor little guy and her response, “ NO he touched my muppet baby and I’m not sorry I punched him in the face!” ya not so cute anymore. It got worse when she hit the teen years. Her teacher called one time and said he sent our sweet little girl to the office for calling him “a foolish old man living in the past.” When she got home and after a long talk about respecting her elders and reminding her that he was after all a history teacher, we suggested she apologize, she replied “OK I’m sorry he’s foolish” ya I didn’t laugh either. Now of course as a young adult sorry, seems to come to her lips quite easily.” Sorry I didn’t call yesterday Daddy, I hope you had a happy birthday” or “sorry I’m late bringing the car back I was with my friends, I’m sure you can catch a later flight.” And so on. The word sorry has many uses in a marriage. As a husband in the beginning of a marriage it didn’t come easily or quickly after an argument with my new bride, but it did come and I was rewarded for using it. Then as the years went by, I found myself not waiting quite as long to use it, but when I did the reward wasn’t as…..enthusiastic..as it was in the past. Then for a while, soon as my beloved and I would start arguing I’d go right to the chase “ OK whatever you say…I’m Sorry…whatever it is…I’m just sorry OK..now can I please watch Wheel of Fortune in peace?”  Ya surprisingly she didn’t like that approach, she felt it lacked in sincerity. So I evolved into giving profound reasoning to any of our disagreements and after listening to her assessment of my shortcomings and debating the pro’s and cons…I’d say “you know what,  by golly your right again, I’m Sorry!”, so far that seems to be working. So there you go an interesting little word that takes practice and timing to use it properly, you’ll get the hang of it Tiger.

 The opening ceremonies of the Vancouver Olympics sucked!  There I said it, and I’m not happy about having to say it because I really wanted them to be good. I wanted the vision of modern Canada to be seen by the entire world! A nation filled with people from every country allowed to express themselves freely and practice their religion without fear of prosecution. I wanted the world to see the modern, clean and relatively crime free cities with their beautiful architecture, I wanted to show the world how we manage to keep our environment green and how were leading the world in lowering our carbon footprint…..OK forget that one (thanks Mr. Harper) I wanted the ceremonies to show our greatest citizens and for the most part they did and I wanted to sing the nations anthem with Canadians right across the country, but I couldn’t because the girl singing it wasn’t singing it the way Canadians sing it! And finally I wanted Wayne Gretzky to stand inside BC Place and use his Canadian made Blackberry to signal a laser to light the Flame at the Vancouver waterfront instead of seeing him ride in the back of a pick-up in the pouring rain hanging on for dear life. Now let’s hope we win so many medals that we totally forget the unimaginative, stereotypical, dis-organized and painfully long event from Friday night. By the way KD Lang was awsesome!

Valentines Day is upon us and I have to say when it comes to romance….I’m…confused, to say the least. I mean a lot of guys walk around pretending to be non-romantic, ya know what I mean loudly proclaiming in front of their buddies that….”maybe if the little woman is lucky I won’t complain that she undercooked my eggs on Valentines this year, I’ll see how I feel” Then when they get home to the little woman, they’re the ones making eggs on Valentines morning so their little pookie is happy. With me, I like to think of myself as a romantic but I’m not sure if my wife would agree, I believe she thinks of me as clumsy in my past attempts at romance, let’s review shall we.  One of our first dates,  oh so many years ago I took her to a very fancy restaurant, I mean fancy schmancy, didn’t even have a drive-thru and it was so long ago I was still smoking. So while the waiter was pouring water, I pulled out a smoke while engaging the server in clever banter you know to impress my future bride, so I light up my cigarette while inhaling deeply only to realize mid-drag that I had lit the wrong end.  Well I started gagging loudly while trying to put out the cigarette filter that was on fire and still trying to be non-chalant I knocked over the glass of water with such force that it hit the waiter in the crotch causing him to spill the pitcher of water, putting out the flaming cigarette. Disastrous right? Apparently not, my wife says it was a night she’ll always remember because I was so nice to the poor waiter after I nearly neutered him that she thought I was a real nice guy…go figure?  I night I remember as being uber romantic was in front of a fireplace, deep shag carpet, excellent bottle of wine, beautiful music just her and I, it was magical….doesn’t even register in her memory…nothing. So the lesson here… when it comes to romance, don’t worry about ambience and wine, save the chocolates and cards, go out and pop some poor waiter in the nards then apologize sincerely and you’ll be in for a lifetime of good lovin! Hey it worked for me, which reminds me. Happy Valentines Darlin!

So whats the deal with the stupid Groundhog. He see’s his shadow six more weeks of winter, he doesn’t early spring. So Wiarton Willie saw his shadow and we’re supposed to get six more weeks of winter which means till the middle of March which in my part of the world means…..an early Spring!!!!  So perhaps I should just relax a little bit and not take this whole rodent prognostication farce so seriously. I mean really, life goes on good weather or bad and why sweat the small stuff, the whole exercise has me re-examining some of the things that perhaps I’m taking too seriously for example.  The guy who fills in for the regular weatherman on weekends on my local TV station is an idiot who drives me crazy and causes me to swear out loud, so I’m not going to let it bother me anymore, I’ll just be thankful he’s only on weekends when I’m more inclined to be drinking. Next, and I know this is stupid but I was feeling bad for Pinks father.  You know Pink the rock star who performed at the Grammy’s last Sunday. If you didn’t see it she sang a song while suspended in mid-air by just a big sheet and was wearing a body suit that left her near naked.  I was thinking…and I know this is a sure sign I’m getting older…strike that…I’m getting more mature..anyway I was first thinking that if I was her Dad I’d be …firstly terrified that  she might fall and secondly I’d be mortified that all the guys at work on Monday morning would be talking about  how hot she looked in that body suit. I really felt bad for him, but now looking back, she’s a rock star so he probably doesn’t have to work.  Finally and I know this is a recurring theme but The Toronto Maple Leafs always worry me but at least I don’t need a stupid groundhog to let me know their season will be over by mid-March.